When did we learn to enjoy food?

When do we learn how to eat solid food?

I’ve been wondering when babies learn how to eat food and when do they master the whole swallowing thing. This past week in Hengyang, I went to the welfare center a couple of mornings. At the center, I’ve held the little ones in one of the baby rooms. I’ve also gotten to help feed them; I’m not very good at feeding them. But, in my defense, the babies are not very good at eating. One little baby boy whom I was feeding, would feel the food on the top of his mouth, and then in an attempt to swallow ended up pushing half of the food back out of his mouth with his tongue. Another girl, I noticed, would cry as she swallowed and would jerk her head back and forth in an attempt to avoid the spoon. I’ve also noticed that my friend’s child, when he was first learning how to eat solid food, would cry as he was eating. He would just whine and whine and would also end up spitting back half of the food in protest. Which leads me to ask, when do babies learn how to eat? When do babies change their attitudes about eating? When does eating go from being something troublesome to something enjoyable? Any thoughts?

Heart's Desire - to learn more

8/20/09: Will you ever know enough? Sometimes I wonder if I will ever have enough Chinese to fully understand people. Will I ever be able to get 80% of what people are saying? Will I ever be able to understand that they are making a joke or being sarcastic or being rude? Will I ever have a taxi ride where I don’t have to ask them to explain some word? Oh to be competent and fluent in Chinese! Recently, I have felt very discouraged and unable to get beyond the language hump of being able to have intimate conversations in Chinese. Although I can talk with people about simple topics, I can’t go deep places with them, and it’s slowly tugging at the corners of my otherwise cheery disposition, making me feel as though my entire year of language study was in vain.

Chinese Riddle?

8/20/09: Bad day of Chinese: Today, I took a taxi home from the hotel where most of my friends’ were staying. The conversation with the friendly taxi driver started out okay. He flattered my Chinese, to which I responded that it was still very poor and that I had problems with many Chinese words. We talked for a few minutes about Chinese food and the price of Chinese apartments. And then, he asked me what I think might have been a riddle. He said, “What does this sentence mean in Chinese…then he said a rather long sentence in Chinese that had to do with studying English in a short time.” …only I had trouble understanding why he was asking me what a Chinese sentence meant? So, I thought he was asking for my opinion about the content of the sentence. I started to give him an answer to what I thought was, “How can a person study English well in a short period of time.” He said that I didn’t understand his meaning; then he complained how he was working very hard to help me understand his meaning, but still I didn’t understand it. “Sorry” I said to him. Then, I hoped he would just forget it, but he kept going on about how he was speaking so slowly and still I didn’t get it. So, I changed the subject and asked him some questions about his family. Then, he said some other stuff that I understood, only by this time, he was very skeptical of my ability to understand any Chinese, so he said, “You don’t understand, do you.” Only this time, I really did understand what he was saying, so I felt kind of annoyed. And furthermore, he was telling me information that I already knew—“you may have to cross the street to meet your friend.” I know! Mental note: repeatedly saying that someone does not understand you is probably not the best method to make friends or to motivate that person to try and understand you. Good-bye distressed taxi driver; Better luck tormenting some other foreigner with your silly riddle.

Beauty - all in the eye

The other day, I was showing my Chinese friends pictures from my brother’s wedding. I was one of the bridesmaids for his wedding, and I had opted to get my make-up done for the ordeal. The make-up process took in excess of one hour, and when I first beheld the final project in the mirror, I felt as though the intensity of the make-up was ridiculous. However, after the lady at the counter assured me the make-up(ed) look would tame down by the time of the wedding, and after I saw the final product of the other bridesmaids faces as well, I accepted the make-upped me. So, it was a close-up picture of me in full, intense make-up to which my Chinese friend commented, “Whoa—so pretty. You should wear your make-up like this everyday.” Hmm, “Probably not I said…it took a long time, and I don’t think there’s any need; I think I look fine the way I am.” My Chinese friend said nothing; I think she was disappointed.

Gnomes

Gnathan the Gnome—I personally think that everyone should have a gnome somewhere in their house. I use to have a gnome in my bedroom. I had bought him for one euro in France. He lived with me in my apartment up until the time I moved to China, when I made the irrational decision that he was frivolous and not worth the poundage in my already stuffed to the breaking point suitcase. However, after being here for several years without a gnome, I realize my error. Even looking at pictures of my gnome – who has since found a new home, makes me very happy. I don’t begrudge the new owner of the gnome—my dear cousin Lauren. She has been more to him than I ever could have been. She has named him, introduced him to her friends, and shown him the love and care he needs. I hope in the future to have another gnome and to give him the same care my cousin has shown him. I don’t know what it is about a gnome…perhaps it’s the promise of gardens and friends, or the reminder of exciting places one’s traveled to and new experiences one’s encountered. Gnathan, wherever your journey takes you, may you enjoy every step of the way.

Exercising

Everyday, at approximately 4:00, I look out the window, and notice that the neighbor man is out for his daily jog—on his porch. He runs back and forth on this little porch (used for drying clothes) for about 20 or 30 minutes. He doesn’t move very fast (as you can imagine he’s switching directions every three feet), and he appears to be wearing normal work clothes. Noticing the way he “exercises” and comparing it to the way I usually “exercise” helps me understand why people might stare at me.

Lately, I’ve been running more here in Hengyang. I guess the local people are not used to seeing a running, foreign woman. I feel annoyed when people stare at me, so I started to respond to them. However, my Chinese friend told me that I was not being very polite, so I will try to think of another way to deal with the attention.
From experience, I now know that I should not say any of the below:
1. What are you looking at?
2. What are you laughing at?
3. Am I ridiculous? I know. Go ahead and laugh.
4. Don’t stare at me.
5. What’s your problem?

Island Picnic

Island Picnic: 8/30/09

Hengyang has a small island that spans at least half a mile. Formerly, this island was more developed and even had a school. The school buildings are still in existence although quite run down. On one end of the island is also a Buddhist temple where a handful of monks still live and where locals go to burn red candles, incense, and ask for blessings from a big, gold statue of Buddah. On the other end of the island, is a place where people go swimming.

Last week, our team went on a picnic on the island. We visited the temple just to see what it was like, and then we hunted for a place to have our picnic. After having no luck finding picnic tables, we asked some of the local people who appeared to live in the former school where we could have our picnic. They told us that we could have a picnic in one of the school rooms for only 30 kuai. We told them that it was too much money when we could have our picnic outside for free. So, they compromised and moved a table and chairs outside in the shade for us and only charged us 10 kuai. We felt happy. The man who helped us with the negotiations was wearing what looked like either underwear or a speedo. Judging from the relative ease with how he conversed with us, I’m guessing it was a speedo.

As we started to take out our lunch, speedo man squatted down on the ground near us, and watched us very carefully. He asked us the usual questions about where we taught, how much money we made, and how long we had lived in China. I could also tell that he was a little perplexed by our picnic lunch: we had packed pb and jelly sandwiches, banana bread, fruit, chips, and cookies. People don’t really have this kind of picnic in China. Usually, they will have a fire pit and barbeque food on sticks or they will have a wok and a firepit and make normal Chinese dishes as though they were still in their kitchen. I think the man thought our lunch or rather we were quite interesting because he continued to squat and watch us for at least the first 5 or 10 minutes of the lunch.

My team-mate, Sarah, laid her 5 month old Devon on some blankets on the ground. Speedo man said that the baby was uncomfortable on the ground. We said that she was fine. However, Devon did start to whine a little bit. I told the man she was crying because he was smoking his cigarette too close to her. He embarrassedly put out his cigarette. Then he mumbled that he had to get back to work and left. We were wondering what kind of job he had that involved him wearing underwear/speedo. We later found out that he drove one of the boats to and from the island.

Happy List for Today :)

Things that made me happy today:
1. Not having to run the air conditioner
2. Someone asking me if I am French
3. Periodically spraying bleach on things in the bathroom--I will win this one!
4. Buying a new computer mouse
5. The quiet peacefulness of this little neighborhood

My second move to Hengyan

8/3/09
Okay—here are my first impressions of new apartment in Hengyang: Disclaimer—these thoughts are disorganized: I’m so happy to see a red, clean, freshly bought bedspread; can’t contain it. Wow—it looks so bright and well-organized in here. There’s not even any dust on the floor. How do I work this washing machine again? What—no plug in the sink? Is this mold I see growing inside this plastic container? Why does the fridge smell like a stale locker room? How am I supposed to shut the bathroom door with a broken handle? How do I work the TV? What’s the number to order water again? Why do I have so much stuff-what’s in all these bags anyways? Seriously—I need to get these clothes into the washing machine fast—how hard can it be to figure out how to work the washing machine? How do I get the cable on the TV to work? Where did I pack that extra extension cord? What is wrong with the mouse on this office computer? How am I going to get the mold and grime off the cleaning supplies?

A New Dish

8/4/09
Tonight was the first time for me to eat drunken shrimp. That’s right. This dish has three ingredients…fresh-water shrimp, ice, and liquor. They pour the liquor over the shrimp to kill them. The shrimp flop around in the bowl and basically drink themselves to death. Once the shrimp are dead drunk, you can eat them. You pull off the shrimps’ head, feet, and the brown string and you dip them in a mixture of wasabi and soy sauce. I wouldn’t say it’s delicious, but it’s palatable. And, if you’re trying to stall time while you’re eating, ordering shrimp is always a good way to go because they take more time to eat.

Living and Finding Joy

8/4/09

Just when I think I have the Father’s plan figured it, it changes, or rather I change.
The reasons I am here, are not what I thought they would be; they aren’t even some back-up reasons I thought they might be. In fact, I have no idea why I’m living in China this summer. It’s not some grand picture or goal like I had originally planned. In fact, the reasons are so cloudy now, I don’t even remember whether or not they were my reasons or someone else’s.

And now, I sit alone..the only foreigner on campus. So far, only a few Chinese friends know I’m here. They seem surprised to see me, and very busy. I don’t mind the time by myself, although I have to laugh. One of my worst fears…being alone, will be this weeks’ reality. It helps me know how insignificant I am. Who notices my absence or my distance?

Instead of feeling angry at people, I feel angry at my own weakness. For relying on people to give me a feeling of worth, or being addicted to conversations with friends, of needing people. I realize that this need for others, is also an idol; should I not be surprised that it’s stripped away? And what’s more amazing, should I not be surprised that amidst living within one of my worst fears, I still feel joy? That even though some of my former friends are busy, the father provides new ones?

English speaker test

Tonight on the bus, I noticed that the young boy beside me was using the same English swear word over and over again. I felt very annoyed and wanted to explain to him how he was being very rude, but I let it go. It was late, hot, and I didn't want to give him the satisfaction that I spoke English and understood the profanity he was throwing around. I've discovered that people will sometimes test if you speak English by repeatedly saying English swear words really loud and seeing how you react. I don't recommend this method.

Supper at a friends'

You know your Chinese friend feels comfortable with you when she changes into her “house” clothes (pajamas) at 5:00. In addition, my friend offered that if I wanted to, I could also change into some of her “house” clothes. I declined, and said that I don’t have that habit and felt perfectly comfortable in my “outside” clothes.

After changing, my friend started to prepare the dishes for the evening meal. She did a fantastic job. I’m always amazed how my Chinese friends make cooking a full meal seem so easy. If it were me, the kitchen would be a mess, there would be smoke filtering out into the apartment, and I would be frazzled. But my friend, just plugged away in the kitchen and insisted that I sit and look through her wedding album and pictures from her travel to Harbin two years ago.

I asked my friend to tell me some more details about her marriage. She said there marriage was okay; it works basically. She also shared that she has no romantic feelings whatsoever toward her husband. I tried to get some more information about how they started dating and how they fell in love (I’m a little bit of a romantic.) The story went like this…a friend of a friend introduced them to each other. They had good feelings toward each other and were both about 30 years old. To a traditional Chinese person, 30 years old is basically the cut-off line for getting married. It either happens by 30, or there isn’t much hope of it happening. So, my friend and her husband decided they should get married. I asked my friend, “Didn’t you ask him to tell you why he wanted to marry you?” She said she didn’t, and she said there wasn’t even a proposal. She also said that Chinese people generally don’t have a proposal. I’ve heard a few other stories similar to this one. I’m going to try and research some more about Chinese dating and marriage relationships.

I have often walked down this street before,

My neighborhood for one more day.

..but the pavement always stayed beneath my feet before.. .

This is the street I walk down everyday to get out of our apartment. They are making the street into a "scenic" street. Hmmm. . .

Welcome Back!

Yesterday, after having been back in Changsha for half a day, the gate keeper asked me if they could come into the apartment and change the placement of the AC units. Our apartment complex is in the midst of some major external renovations. Part of this renovation is changing the position of all the outside AC units so they line up straight from top to bottom. I asked the apartment manager if they could wait three days until I moved out; they said it couldn’t wait (which I don’t believe.) So a crew of 3 -4 Chinese men came to my apartment and began the process. I was a little embarrassed because I had done two loads of laundry that morning and because it had been raining outside, the laundry was strewn across the apartment, including my unmentionables. So—I tried to move a few things to my room, and clean up a tiny bit before they arrived.

Two of the workers arrived along with the young gate-keeper guy. The young gate-keeper was there at the request of his Uncle (the main gate-keeper.) So, while the two guys were working in my room, I just sat awkwardly in our disheveled living room and made small talk with the gate-keeper guy whom I think has a little crush on me. He started asking me questions about whether I have a boyfriend or not. Now, this is a fairly normal question for people to ask foreigners here in China. But, he asked me how my parents would feel about me having a Chinese boyfriend. And, in addition, he was smiling a lot and acting jittery. It’s at times like these, when I let my Chinese level slip a few notches and pretend I’m not sure what the other person is talking about. I think this probably also makes me look incompetent and less crush-worthy (that’s what I was going for.) Just then, one of the workers stepped out into the living room and started taking out his cigarette to light up. I asked him kindly if he could go outside to smoke. Now, if he had asked me for permission to smoke inside our apartment, I very likely would have let him. However, the presumption that he could just start smoking without asking, kind of frustrated me. All this after being back in Changsha not even a day. There is more to this story that made it an even more frustrating situation, but you'll just have to ask me the details to find out.